I really don't know how to go about blogging about this without sounding like I'm just marketing. Yeah, when I set out to re-read Freakhouse last night, it was to comb through, grab a few quotes, and spiff up the ol' author page a bit. But once I started reading it, I was just a reader. 

I know that I've mentioned this before in other posts, but it still surprises me each time. First of all, no one thinks that what I do isn't good enough worse than I do. It's a sad reality, but yes, I will look back on any one of my successes and tear it down, justifying how it really wasn't anything great. I don't do it to be modest; this is clearly a self-esteem issue and I'm happy to be honest about that. So while I remember my writing of Freakhouse, remember the incubation in my head, the brutality of editing, and the thrill of publication, I don't remember it being a great read. I remember being proud of it, and loving it at the time, but as time goes on I can convince myself that past me was slightly delusional. 

So it's been a while since I've actually sat down and read Freakhouse. After proofing version after version, your own work can be the last thing you ever want to read. Last night, I wasn't a writer, I was just a reader, and I was absorbed from the first page. It was strange watching everything unfold as separate from me, and I don't mean in a bad way at all, I mean in the way that you fall into any good book that you've never read before. But I have read this book, I should know this book better than anyone. And yet, as I was falling in love with it, I couldn't help but wonder "Who wrote this?!?!" Despite my vivid recollection, despite my name and picture being smeared all over it, I could not see myself having written something that I loved this much.

You have to admit, that's pretty sad, and it says a lot about it in not so pleasant ways. But I'm not seeking sympathy here. I just wanted to share the awe. Freakhouse is one of my most favourite books - as a reader. How could I have forgotten that? This story, these characters that mean so much to me! One of my favourite books of all time, and on top of that, I wrote it - I don't know how, but through some strange inexplicable universe-bending phenomenon, I created something beautiful. 

I am hardly my own biggest fan, but maybe it is time that I renew that fan-club membership. Clearly I've been missing out.

Sometimes the most interesting things happen to other people. And sometimes things happen to other people that are far more interesting once you've hyperbolised the snot out of it! This is the latter:

A Second Hand Story - Tales from the Barwench


"The Adventures of Lord Gorgous and his Tiny Nuts"

Lord Gorgeous: Barwench! Where are my nuts?

Barwench: *stares blankly*

Barwench: *slides a bowl of mixed nuts towards needy patron*

Lord Gorgeous: I won’t pay for these! Find me smaller nuts!

Barwench: *stares blankly*

Barwench: They only come in one size, Sir.

Lord Gorgeous: Damnit, I said I need smaller nuts!

Barwench: *headdesk*

I've been wanted to write an entry to counter the raging rant of my previous post, but since I'm still trudging through the Knightsbridge revisions, my hopes of a celebratory post are still on a "To Be Announced" status. Though, if I'm going to address it at all, I might as well say that I have not been spiting fireballs at my novel-in-progress the entire time. In fact, since that post I've fallen in love again with several characters, scenes, and really am remembering why I've been carrying this story around with me for all of these years. I wanted to be finished for the end of summer, but alas, I think the new goal is to be finished before this year's NaNoWriMo.

Speaking of NaNoWriMo... yes, this is where I was planning to go all along...

I refuse to let my failure last year continue on into this one! Feeling slightly down about how long it's taking me to wrap things up with Knightsbridge and reminiscing about how smoothly things went with Freakhouse, I've joined forces with my partner-in-crime to really hold myself to my writing deadlines. 

Aside from last year, I'm very good at reaching the 50,000 word count during November. I'm less good at actually finishing my novels in that amount of time. With Knightsbridge lingering on year after year, and me realizing that when I said "first draft complete" I was clearly kidding myself because I used so many shortcuts that the last third of the story isn't even readable, I really really need to make sure that I don't fall into this endless writing cycle ever again!

I'm not a very big Stephen King fan, but I did come across an article that gave me some food for thought. "22 Lessons from Stephen King On How To Be A Great Writer", like any article about writing tells you what works for a particular writer, and there are so many of these that you really can't follow each one word for word because in the end your craft really has to be your own. Still, there is good advice to be found, but the one that really stuck to me this time through was #19. Finish your first draft in three months. Now, NaNoWriMo already sets the challenge to your first draft in one month, that being said, a first draft is not always 50,000 words. Some people are amazing writing robots and complete 100,000 - 200,000 words in one month... I am no such robot. But I do agree that having a story linger on is painful. A great part of my frustration with Knightsbridge this time is that I was in a mindset of doing light revision, not completing a 1st draft all over again. It's defeating thinking you've done something and then realizing that you're back at square one again. 

I need some tough love sometimes. Now I'm going to let my writing friends give me the kick in the butt I need this November. 

I present to you The 3 Month Novel Challenge Pact. In this pact, I will agree to start and complete a full 1st draft between November 1st and January 31st, or else subject myself to online public humiliation. Much inspired by the "Cone of Shame" I already adopted in Curious Endeavourances when I not only failed to read the novel but also entirely forgot that we were scheduled to meet that day, the "Cone of Shame" is the chosen consequence for my own laziness. Yes, even when completely overwhelmed by life I have an obligation to my story, and even if I'm in tears, I have no excuse but the lack of sheer will-power that stops me from taking responsibility for my obligations.

Now, mostly this pact was invented in the spirit of good-humoured silliness, but I intend to uphold it and all of the possible ridicule that may follow - starting in November. 

I encourage anyone who is interested in writing to take up a challenge, even if not one that includes embarrassing online videos, to stay focused and motivated. And as always, www.nanowrimo.org is amazing resource for any level of writer or seeker of writing related things.  I will put up a page on my website, but I'm hoping that we can include it all together with Curious Endeavourances, after all, this is quite a curious endeavourance! 

Now if I can just get this last novel done in time!

The 3 Month Novel Challenge Pact

By agreeing to this pact, I agree to begin and complete a full 1st draft of my novel within 3 months.


Failure to complete the 1st draft during the proposed time will result in a public online display of my shame. Within 24 hours following the final day of the 3rd month (ie. midnight of the 31st to midnight of the 1st), I shall upload a video of myself, wearing the cone of shame, and address the reasons behind my failure. I shall declare my excuse(s), as well as the depths of my failure (including how little was accomplished in terms of word count, pages, or chapters).


Should the novel still remain incomplete in the following month, I agree to post a another “Cone of Shame” video, wearing the cone of shame, outlining my failures, within 24 hours following the last day of the month, and “Cone of Shame” videos shall continue to be made and uploaded until such a time as the novel draft is complete, with the following variations:


2nd offence: Must make video with clothes on inside out


3rd offence: Consuming a spoonful of ketchup


4th offence: Wearing last year’s Halloween costume


5th offence: Fashioning a toiletpaper dress


6th offence: Performing a dramatic recitation of “The Frivolous Cake”


7th offence: Recording the video in a public place


8th offence: Being covered in full body paint


9th offence: Consuming a spoonful of cinnamon


Failure to complete the novel by the 12th month will result in the final “Cone of Shame” video post, which will include a declaration of defeat and a funeral service for my dead novel in which all respects are paid.  The Funeral service shall end with a bucket full of ice water being overturned on my head.



Read more: http://www.businessinsider.com/stephen-king-on-how-to-write-2014-7#ixzz3CSCFUI6k