Back when I tried my first dozen takes of my Cone of Shame video, I was actually super happy. I was back into a writing flow, I started completely fresh, wrote four brilliant chapters that couldn't have felt more good if it had been made out of chocolate pudding and puppies - but not puppies in chocolate pudding, that doesn't work out for anyone. But thanks to computer gremlins who found it hilarious to cause video disconnections at rapidly increasing rates, no video. Add regular work in with the sudden appearance of inexplicable bodily pain, and the distance between me and White Rabbits has grown frighteningly. And by "inexplicable" I mean by medical professionals, not just me; heck, I'd forget about receiving a paper cut and that would count as inexplicable pain in my books.
Fighting for every chance I get to read is my win right now. Reading is keeping me connected to those worlds beyond reality. No idea when I'm going to be able to get back into writing; I've been so outside of myself lately.
Remember when Terry Brooks said that when a writer doesn't write, it starts to destroy them? Okay, so I'm paraphrasing, but he did say how it does make us ill, it makes us grumpy and sick and unable to cope with a lot of rather simple things. Who has two thumbs and feels like this? This girl!
Notice my ranting? I haven't written in so long that just being able to spew out rants is actually alleviating tons of pressure. It's one step closer to fiction but without the added need of consistency.
The plus side is that before random painfulness, I did do some amazing things. Those four chapters of White Rabbits, while only just four chapters, actually did a lot to surprise me, and I love those surprises! And that's not all I've been working on. Some of those other works-in-progress have been getting some attention and I really am working towards expanding the reach of my collection.
So despite my moment of pessimism, I am still trying. I made a resolution for this year, remember? "Be Unstoppable!" It's not easy when I'm the biggest hurdle standing in my own way, but man can I make some mountains move when I put my mind to it!
Like today. Finally put together the Cone of Shame video. It's super short, but that means that the video didn't have time to disconnect...
I wonder if it's the computer gremlins that have moved into my head? They always do try to get in one way or another. Quick! Someone call the Winchesters! Tell them there'll be puppies and chocolate pudding!