Ashley Newell
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Tea Quest: Super Ginger

4/21/2017

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Can't say that I'm not determined to try something new. Super Ginger: ginger and black pepper. Not a flavour combo I would typically chose to drink, but for the sake of science - er... I mean my pointless quest - why not? 
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The moment I opened her up and took a whiff, I knew I was in trouble. Whoa that's a strong smell - and, yes, it smelled like awful...

But! I did previously consume a tea that smelled like delicious, and it was no so in liquid form. So I went for it!

I will say this, it doesn't taste as awful as it smelled. It didn't taste good, but it definitely smelled worse. And boy did this one have bite. It doesn't bite you right away. I braced myself for it, thought I was mistaken, but by the 2nd sip I realized "There it is!"

I made it to about four sips before abandoning this cup. 

Verdict: Hell no.

​But, hey, I'm proud of myself for trying something new!
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Tea Quest: Mother's Little Helper

4/18/2017

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With my success with Cold 911, I thought that the peppermint component of Mother's Little Helper might be a success. After all, I've already finished half the box of Cold 911 and we have become fairly good friends. Now that I'm not as sick, my desire to have tea in general has gone down, but I'm still going forward. And as I said above, going with a similar blend as the one I don't mind seemed like a good idea.
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Well I could definitely taste the peppermint and the lemongrass. Much more potent than the Cold 911. But there was also a hint of *gag*. No, I'm not clearly my throat preparing to say the missing ingredient. I'm not sure which ingredient it is - my guess is the chamomile, but I didn't do a scientific study on this, so I could be wrong. Nonetheless, I got through three sips and there it sat. 

Verdict: Pass. Just pass.

I would take the drowned cupcake over this any day. It's not the worst. It was a hint of *gag*, not instant *gag*, so I suppose that's something, isn't it?

​I am so not a tea person... onward anyway!
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Tea Quest: Birthday Cake

4/16/2017

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My quest continues, and next on the list is the fan-favourite Birthday Cake. It sounded fun, is well-received by David's followers, and honestly does smell like cake through the packaging. I was pretty excited about this one. ​
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Well, I can say this much: it does taste like a delicious cupcake...
... that was then placed inside a jumbo fish tank, of which the water was ladled out and then consumed by me from my little mug. I can tell that it was once a delicious cupcake. Now, however, it is watered down mush. 

I don't care what kind of diet you are on, the combination is always cake and ice cream, not cake and a gallon of water. 

Did I hate it? No. I would definitely take this over the gag-worthy ice tea that I keep accidentally ordering at American food chains, but that doesn't mean that I enjoyed it. I drank about half of my cup before abandoning it. 

Birthday Cake Verdict: Pass. If you served it to me, I could finish my cup out of politeness, but it's not something I will be ordering of my own free will. 

I'm sure that if you are someone who actually likes tea in general, this one is scrumdiddilyumpcious. I am not that person. This is not my cup of tea.
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Tea Quest: The Beginning

4/8/2017

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I know that I'm a particular type of person. I'm not vastly unusual, but there are a few things that other people just can't seem to wrap their minds around. For some reason what I drink is the biggest thing that people don't understand about me - or rather, what I don't. I don't drink alcohol (yes, at all, even though most people interpret that is "oh, just once in a while, I get that!" which I think says a lot about our society when I say "No" and it somehow MUST mean "just a little bit, and then I'll totally go for it." Really, people?), I don't drink coffee, and I don't drink tea. All of the above are pretty much just gross to me. Nothing religious or diet-based. I just don't like it. 

And I usually stand behind this quite happily, until I get sick. When I'm sick I wish that I didn't find tea so gross because my parched sore throat would greatly welcome warm beverage, and as you can see, my list of applicable warm beverages is quite small. I have over the years found a few tea-less alternatives, not that I find them particularly enjoyable either, but usually just the lesser of two evils. 

Well, fast-forward to this past month in which my whole household has been passing around one form of illness or another for fun-filled month-long suffering. It all started with a cold. Baby and I got a bit snotty, but overall were pretty functional. Then hubby brought home a 2nd case of strep, which I then caught. Both on medication. He gets better, and mine, well, it either got angry and hulked-out, or it tag-teamed it's hired muscle to beat the crap out of me. None of the tests came back positive to prove which it was, but the point is that I had to go to urgent care to get pumped full of antibiotics and signed-up for a home IV program. I think I was probably the calmest about all of this since we went through so much homecare with my son, and since it was just me and not him, I was pretty nonchalant about changing my own med bags. It may have been a pump that was connected to my bloodstream instead of a tube to a tummy, but a pump is a pump and I wasn't phased by it at all. I also was ready to do just about anything to not choke to death in my sleep as my throat closed in on itself. 

I only had 4 days of home IV, and then it seemed under control enough to shift me to pills like a regular sick person. Though don't get me wrong, since the infection was severe and unknown, I was on super antibiotics that kill everything, even the good stuff I'm supposed to have in my body. But whatever, it was working. 

Then enter the next round of family sharing. A vomit bug. Baby got it. Hubby said he had it. And then I got it, which wouldn't have been a big deal except for the fact that my super meds need me to have a full tummy or else stomach contents will evacuate my body... Like seagulls, not fun.

But whatever, it only lasts a day and then I'm good to go, finish off my meds. Which I did. And then woke up to square one: a cold.

Long story I know, but the point is that having a horribly sore throat got me seriously reconsidering the tea thing. Now, there have been a few concoctions that I haven't hated, but more in a one-shot situation where I didn't really pay attention to what it was and so never find it again. And since I have no intention of drinking tea casually at the moment, my need to find those teas haven't been very strong.

Well, damn it, I declare my tea challenge on! I spontaneously stopped by David's Tea yesterday, for I know that the man David, who I can only assume is a witch, has procured brews I haven't hated. I picked up a few varieties and will begin my quest for tea I don't hate. Because right now my house has been filled with Lady Grey, which my husband likes, and I, quite frankly, have to choke that shit down. 

Now, my new round of cold began just this morning, so it was quite convenient that I had the foresight to pick this up:
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So I put the kettle on this morning and gave it a try. 

I didn't hate it. 

I won't go so far to say that I enjoyed it. I wouldn't drink it just because. But I was able to take continuous sips and finish my cup before it got cold. That's pretty good for me. 

But it gets better! Bonus points for actually clearing out nose/throat mucus! I don't know what the recommended dosage is, how frequently I will have to reapply throughout my day, but I'm gonna go ahead and say that it works. And it tastes a hell of a lot better than Neo-Citran so that's always a win, and non-caffeinated so could totally have a cup before bed.

Cold 911
Verdict:
It's a keeper. Again, I wouldn't serve it casually, but I think my family would seriously benefit from having a hefty supply in our pantry.

So day one of my tea challenge has been a success. I will continue on my quest to find something I enjoy. Maybe I will enter my 30's as a tea drinker. That gives me 2 years to discover the holy grail of teas!

Wish me luck!
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    Ashley Newell, stupendous noveling sensation whom you've probably never heard of...
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