...Okay non-writer people, I know that sounds crazy, but trust me, this is how it goes down. Dotan (my lead) got mad at me and basically wouldn't let me end Freakhouse. He shut down, stopped talking to me, and pretty much sent me into a panic because I had an awesome story that wasn't going anywhere. Long story short (and minus all of the spoilers) I figured out what pissed him off, we re-connected, and he showed me where Freakhouse was going. I was resistant, but he convinced me. So Parish was already pre-set in my mind, and I thought ready to go. Refer back to opening paragraph. Basically after my midnight kickoff (and my writing attempts thereafter), Dotan was staring at me blankly and calling me an idiot. And I really couldn't argue against that. I looked at what I had come up with and felt immediately guilty for wanting to sell books to an unsuspecting public who would read this crap. Once I got my head clear, de-stressed, and admitted that I had a problem, my lead and I reconnected again.
So I have committed my first NaNo cheat of the session (yes, session, NaNoing is full of underhanded NaNo cheats, it's pretty much a rule, like interpreting the Pirates' Code as guidelines). I drew a line under the crap and restarted. I'm back in the Freakhouse world, I'm back in Dotan's head (or he's in mine), and I am finally in that space where I am proud to be a writer. This is what I love. This is why I drive myself crazy every year with NaNo. If I keep doing this, I won't feel the slightest bit guilty for having you read what I'm writing.
P.S. It's not schizophrenia, it's creativity, there is a difference. My voices go away after I let them tell their stories.